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Joke of the Day
"""When it rains, it pours."" -Shitty weatherman"
Next Joke
"There's a little ""I'm jealous"" in every ""whatever."""
"Took a window fitting course the other day. Smashed it."
"What's the hardest part about eating a Vegetable? putting her back in the wheelchair when you're done."
"Make a fire with someone and they'll be warm for a night. Make a fire with someone and they'll be warm for the rest of their life."
"A guaranteed way to make a hormone... Don't pay her..."
"Life on earth is expensive, but it does include an annual free trip around the sun"
"Priest: Do you take this woman to be your wife? Me: ""I do"" Priest: Ok can you say it again without using finger quotes while you do it"
"2 Jehovah's witnesses knocked earlier, so I invited them in. I gave 1 the hoover & 1 a mop. If they can do Gods work, they can do mine."
"What do you get from a forgetful cow? Milk of amnesia!"