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Joke of the Day

"whats the most uncomfortable thing about a prostate exam? When you ask the doctor where to put your pants and his reply is right next to mine."

"Q: What happened to the Irishman who tried to kill himself by .swallowing 100 pain killers? A: After two he began to feel better."

"The Hotness Scale I went out on a date with a chick the other night. Looks-wise, she was a five, but with her low self esteem, she was a solid seven."

"They are writing a biography about my dick Ok. Ok. A pamphlet."

"I've said it before and I'll say it again: the Bible is 100% accurate. Especially when thrown at close range."

"A hipster's favorite frequency is 50,000 Hz You've probably never heard it"

"What do STDs and jokes have in common? They're both easily spread."

"I don't mean to be a party pooper but... where's your bathroom?"

"My wife is gorgeous, selfless, amazing, highly intelligent and looking over my shoulder as I type."

"Everytime someone cuts me off in traffic, an angel gets its wings Because I'm going to kill a motherfucker."