153271

Joke of the Day

"How do you know when you're too drunk to drive? When you swerve to miss a tree and realize it was your air freshener"

"What did the egg say to the boiling water? It may take me a while to get hard, I got laid last night."

"The yard. Son: Dad! Dad: What is it son? Son: Boys are gathering into our yard! Dad: ...How many boys? Son: All of them... Dad: MY MILKSHAKES!"

"Do all black people have a problem with slavery? Or just mine?"

"Have you ever noticed the lack of trigger discipline cops have in movies? It's so realistic."

"Where did Robin Williams go after he died? To the Mork."

"A group of people walk into a bar... An Irishman, a rabbi, a Japanese man, a blind man and a boat captain walk into a bar. The bartender asks ""is this some kind of a joke?"""

"Grandma got run over by a Prius. Grandma is fine. The Prius is totaled. And there's glitter and Obama stickers everywhere. Merica."

"Q: What is the blonde's chronic speech impediment? A: She can't say ""No""."

"My sex life is just like star wars: Its either Han Solo, or i have to use the force."