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Joke of the Day

"Pay attention to funeral dress codes Sombre is only a couple of letters away from Sombrero"

"[School] Teacher: What's ur biggst fear? Child1: Ghosts! Child2: Dogs! Child3: That humanity's core reaction to misunderstanding is anger"

"What does Jean Valjean use to listen to music? Cosettes."

"Why is it bad for blind people to skydive? It scares the hell out of the dog"

"my mom walked in when I was printing out a naked picture of a woman in 5th grade& we sat there in silence listening to the loud, 90s printer"

"Wife and I taking a shower Wife: I want you to do bad things to me. Me: <pours shampoo in her eyes>"

"Hillary Clinton's autobiography should be called, ""Sisterhood of the traveling pants suit""."

"You've gotta hand it to short people.. Usually because they can't reach it"

"What's the most common question in Quantum Physics? I don't know"

"Why are iPhones' batteries not called apple juice Because they don't have enough juice in them ^Explanation: ^circlejerk ^on ^iPhone's ^battery ^running ^out ^fast don't kill me pls, i love apple ^yay"