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Joke of the Day

"[School] Teacher: What's ur biggst fear? Child1: Ghosts! Child2: Dogs! Child3: That humanity's core reaction to misunderstanding is anger"

"There should be a subreddit specifically for internet humor that gets lost in translation when you explain it in real life... ...and it should be called r/SlashAreSlash."

"Mom, don't freak out, but I'm in the hospital. NoUrImmature, you've been a doctor for eight years now. Please stop starting every phone conversation we have with that."

"If I had to pick between being a hardcore Democrat and being a hardcore Republican I would definitely choose a noose."

"How is Michael Jackson like the thousands of people outside times square on new years? Once the balls drop, They're no longer interested!"

"What pokemon would you catch in Antarctica? Freezing."

"What game do reindeer play in their stalls? Stable-tennis!"

"I wish I could hang out with Gwen Stefani. We would discuss which shit is/isn't bananas."

"I'd rather drop a baby than my iPhone.... I mean I can make another baby, but I have no clue how to make an iPhone."

"My French buddy keeps trying to get me to drink It's a lot of Pierre pressure"