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Joke of the Day
"If used correctly, Twitter can be used as an antidepressant. Just don't take it as a suppository."
Next Joke
"What restaurant does a fast food worker/hacker work at? HackDonalds."
"If 2016 had a twitter account it should have one of those ""If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best"" bios Because 2016 is a crazy bitch"
"The bills are washed, the dishes are paid, the laundry's in the oven. I'm going to bed."
"How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant? (NSFW) He forgot to wrap his Whopper!!"
"Did you guys hear about the 4 car accident in Mexico? ...94 people died."
"I removed the shell from my pet snail... because I thought it would move around quicker. Now it's just really sluggish"
"I'm not saying I hate you but if you were on fire I'd bring sticks and marshmallows."
"Q: Did you know they are taking out all the K-Marts in Afghanistan? A: They are putting in TARGETS!!!"
"Scientology has spaceships?! Crazy! I'll stick to my guy who parted the sea with his mind."