120215

Joke of the Day

"I removed the shell from my pet snail... because I thought it would move around quicker. Now it's just really sluggish"

Next Joke
 
"Dropped some rice in water so I put it in a bag of cellphones to dry out"
"""If you know about us Canadians, we like to say sorry..."" ""And if you knew that already... I'm sorry"""
"I can't believe I shaved my toes for this"
"I can't Colbert it, they were the Stewartship of my news and entertainment."
"Highways are a lot like toilets... It only takes a couple big shits to back everything up."
"TIFU I'm like a 4/10 and she was a total 9."
"Why did the ""M&M;"" go to university? He wanted to become a ""Smartie"""
"You heard about the guy who stole that calendar right? he got 12 months ...I'll see myself out"
"Did you hear Charlie Sheen has HIV? He thinks he got it after sleeping with two and a half men."