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Joke of the Day

"[2016, cincinnati zoo. boy falls into the enclosure] other gorilla: something brought a boy to the yard harambe [making a milkshake]: SHIT"

"What's yellow and flys through walls? A magic banana..."

"I like women like i like my pizza Crusty with lots of cheese."

"What is green and smells like pork? Kermits finger..."

"What did Adam say to Eve? Stand back, I don't know how big this thing gets!"

"I keep hearing ""Just be yourself"" from everyone. I didn't realize so many people want me to go to prison :("

"Positive thinking comes in all shapes and sizes at your nearest liquor store..."

"One of the World's Strongest Man events should be ""Pulling apart two shopping carts that are stuck together."""

"My daughter is worse than a twitter newbie.. She manually Retweets everything I say... To my wife!"

"I think my favorite Thanksgiving food is pie But some people say that's irrational..."