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Joke of the Day

"If one drop of semen contains more life than a drop of blood, why don't vampires s*ck co*k? Oh wait, Twilight."

"I just rolled my eyes so hard, I can see my brain."

"Why do pagans make the best husbands and wives? Because they'll worship the ground you walk on."

"What did the Middle Eastern terrorist say when he was captured by the police? Oman!"

"Adrian Peterson got a new job... he was picked up by the Minnesota twins... He's gonna be their new ""switch hitter"""

"FBI offers to help France investigate the terrorist attacks. So far, they think North Korea is behind it."

"With a bit of practice I could be an excellent snooker player... But I dont have the balls and my pockets aren't that deep"

"Name dog. Call dog every derivative of that name but the actual name."

"I have some jokes about unemployment but they need some work."

"My friend lost his virginity to his teacher when he was only 13 years old. A pretty impressive feat, especially for someone who was homeschooled."