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Joke of the Day

"Donald Trump is about to watch an episode of his current favorite TV show... Orange is the New Black"

"When I was young, I played the triangle in a reggae band. I just used to stand at the back 'n' ting."

"Got up at 6:30am today. Did some yoga. Had a protein shake. Ran six miles. Started lying about everything."

"Q: What do you have with Dick Cheney, Dick Morris, and Dick Nixon in the same room? NSFW A: Way too much cock and bull."

"In my day cartoons made sense. Chipmunks did all the rescue rangering and a rich duck swam in gold coins like they were water"

"I'd rather drop a baby than my iPhone.... I mean I can make another baby, but I have no clue how to make an iPhone."

"Q: How can u drop an egg onto a concrete floor without breaking it? A: Any way you want, concrete floors tend to be very hard to crack."

"this is the police, we have u surrounded come out with your hands on ur head, then ur shoulders, okay good now knees and toes knees and toes"

"The sheer terror of laughing at a joke you didn't understand and then someone asking you to explain it to them."

"""I loves hows you've done me spinach Doc!"" Popeye tells his host. Hannibal winks. ""The secret is to add a bit of Olive Oil."""