151560

Joke of the Day

"I hear Adrian Peterson is getting into baseball... Apparently he's a great switch hitter."

"Yeah baby, I'm the lead singer in a band. Well, more of a backing singer. More of a Drummer. Triangle player..Roadie. I Saw a band once."

"What has 4 legs and 1 arm? A pitbull on a children's playground."

"My mind says ""no"" but my heart says ""yes"", all my vital organs speak English, it's very confusing and loud"

"Why didn't the President fight with the chair? Because we don't negotiate with chair-orrists."

"I just saw a woman push 5 little kids in a shopping cart out of Walmart. I didn't realize that you could get them in bulk now."

"What was King Arthur's favourite game ? Knights and crosses !"

"I was going to consider brief units of time but now I'm having second thoughts."

"Hate it when you open the fridge and can't find what you were looking for; like happiness and perfect abs."

"I went to a cemetery today. The entire time I was there my phone didn't have any service. I must have been in a dead zone."