150961

Joke of the Day

"We're gonna break the Twitter on Mother's Day with Your Mom jokes, aren't we?"

"How many perverts does it take to put in a light bulb? Just the two... but it takes a whole dedicated team at emergency to remove it."

"A little bit of racism Scientists have found that your fingerprints may indicate that you are black or white. For example, if your fingerprints were found at the crime scene, you're probably black."

"I inherited one of the paintings done by Adolf Hitler today. I don't want to hang it in my house though. I'm afraid it's bad Jew Jew."

"BREAKING: Man arrested for owning a waterbed. Police reported that ""it's not really illegal, but a waterbed in 2014? That's just creepy."""

"""Ugh I sent so many drunk carrier pigeons last night"" -medieval millennials"

"Text from mom: How's my baby girl? Me: I'm moving back in. Mom: Your room is ready. Me: No, your uterus! Mom: Steph you drink too much"

"What is the difference between a gay man and a freezer? A freezer doesn't fart when you pull meat out of it."

"Im going to change my name on Facebook to ""Benefits"", so that when you add me it will say, ""You are now friends with benefits"""

"Why should they have hosted the World Cup in a different country this year? .... because a brazillian things could go wrong"