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Joke of the Day

"Drug mules carry cannabis up their asses. That shit is dope."

"Look I see that you love me and would die for me, but this guy over here barely notices me and has a GF. I'll play the odds. -Woman logic"

"What type of animals are put on envelopes? Seals."

"I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works."

"I stopped fighting my inner demons; We're totes BFFs now."

"So a horse walks into a bar... The bartender says, ""Why the long face?"" The horse responds, ""They wouldn't renew Sex and the City for another season."""

"My eyesight is so bad that, after I took my contacts out last night, I chatted to my cat for 5 mins before I realised it was my handbag."

"Actually Frankenstein was the name of the scientist. I, the person correcting you on this trivial point, am the monster."

"What's green and smells like ham? Kermit the frog's finger"

"Where do mermaids go to see movies? ...The dive-in"