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Joke of the Day

"Why can't you trust an atom? Because they make up literally everything"

"I just quit my job crushing cans at the soft drink factory... It was just soda pressing."

"To all /r/Jokes subs you really need the A"

"I can count on one hand the number of times I've visited Chernobyl... it's 14"

"A rough, hard drinking baseball umpire was upset because he couldn't get his little boy to sit on his lap and talk to him. After all, the son never sits on the brutish umpire."

"I can't pull rabbits out of a hat... But I can pull hares out of my ass!"

"THIS JUST IN: Hooters seeks extra support due to unprecedented sagging. So yeah, Hooters is for sale."

"Sorry I asked for a rim job... ... it was only tongue in cheek."

"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's meant to be. So only become emotionally invested with boomerangs and dogs."

"If loving copies is wrong, I don't want to be copyright."