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Joke of the Day

"THIS JUST IN: Hooters seeks extra support due to unprecedented sagging. So yeah, Hooters is for sale."

"An Imperial Roman soldier was wounded on the battlefield. His life was saved when he was time traveled to the modern world to be hooked up to an IV. He asked, ""What is that for?"""

"Forgetting what you went into the kitchen to get is one thing but, it's darn scary when you can't remember why you went into the bathroom!"

"Why do the French stink? So blind people can hate them too"

"What did the sick gyro say to the other gyro? I falafel."

"I just bought a treadmill. It was a little pricey, but I think it will be worth it in the long run"

"If you want to know if a girl is into you, look at her feet. If they point away from you she's not interested, if they're behind her ears she's very interested."

"Did you hear about the first deaf man to be sent into Space? He didn't either"

"Damn girl, are you an old ATM touchscreen? 'Cause I'm pushing ALL the wrong buttons."

"I missed the lunar eclipse, but I've seen shadows before, so I get how awestruck everyone was."