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Joke of the Day

"I named my kids after the place they were conceived Although I'm almost 100 percent sure Intheass isn't mine."

"I now determine the days of the week based on Twitter. Is it Follow Friday yet?"

"What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass. TL'DR - My ass."

"What did the DNA say to the mRNA? ""I'm better without U."""

"I saw a fight between two Mobius strips It was a little one sided (One of them had a Klein bottle)"

"Did you hear about the depressed man going on a cross country road trip? He's weeping the nation."

"Who is the strongest thief? A shoplifter."

"I like my sheds the way I like my strip clubs... ...dark and full of hoes"

"So I checked into a nihilist hotel, and asked for turndown service. The clerk at the reception looked at me wearily and responded: ""Turndown? What for?"""

"What's the best part about dating a black girl? Not having to wait for her downstairs with her father."