149590

Joke of the Day

"What happens in a battle between storm troopers and red shirts? (Star Trek) The storm troopers all miss, and the red shirts all die"

"Superman and Eyore had a baby. The baby's name? Supereyore"

"Why does it suck to work for the NSA during the winter? Because if it snows, you can't call and say you're snowed in."

"So a Trabi owner pulls up to a gas station... ...and says to the attendant: ""Two windscreen wipers for my Trabi please."" The attendant replies: ""That sounds like a good deal!"""

"I bet aliens would visit us more if Will Smith didn't punch them in the head as soon as they got here."

"What do you call a fake noodle?... An Impasta!"

"What is the name of the secret society of weavers? I-loom-'n'-I-tie"

"People who say everything happens for a reason should remember that when I punch them in the face."

"If I had a dime for every time I didn't know what was going on... I'd be like, ""Why ya'll keep giving me all these dimes?"""

"50 Cent used to be 1 Dollar... But now he's only half the man he was."