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Joke of the Day

"I'm working on a Star Wars Kama Sutra book. I don't have all the positions down quite yet, but I have mastered the Hand Solo."

"Why is K-9 another term for a dog? Because if it was a cat, it would be a K-10."

"Sing to the tune of ""Yankee Doodle""... Helen Keller went to town, A-ridin' on a pony, Stuck a feather in her hat and called it ""Hunngunnggunufffungg"""

"What do you call an Irish woman who stays out all night? Patty O'Furniture"

"Where would Helen Keller park her car? On top of three children."

"Had to Return the Sensitive Toothpaste I bought yesterday... It couldnt take a joke!"

"""IN THIS CORNER.. DWAYNE ""THE ROCK"" JOHNSON"" *the rock beats chest* AND IN THIS CORNER... RYAN ""PAPER"" WALLACE *the rock is visibly nervous*"

"I'm gonna get a neck tattoo that looks exactly like my neck."

"*hears robber in house* If anybody is there.. I have Updog & I'm not afraid to use it. ""What's Updog?"" Not too much haha you? ""Robbing you"""

"HEROIC ACT - I stick my head under dressing room doors to tell people they look nice in whatever they are trying on."