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Joke of the Day

"Chuck Norris Found The Ark Of The Covenant... He Currently Uses It As A Coffee Table."

"I hate one-dimensional games. They're so linear."

"Why do tornadoes move so erratically? -They are dizzy"

"My wife called me a ""panty dropper."" She said to be more careful with the laundry next time."

"How does a hipster measure out his drugs? Using instagrams."

"If college football created a bowl game called the ""Hyperbole,"" which two teams would be selected to play in it? The two greatest teams in the history of the known universe."

"Why do handicapped people wear shoes? Because if they didn't their local gas station would turn a blind eye."

"Pro Tip: don't fall asleep during the middle of an argument with your spouse over whether or not you pay attention to her."

"Which country has the cheapest prostitutes? Vietnam. Because over there you need 20840 dongs to make a dollar."

"ME: ""Whoa. Put a combo on that meat locker."" HIM: ""Huh?"" ME: ""Your fly is down, idiot."""