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Joke of the Day

"Attention fat vegans: Explain."

"Jon Snow ask a wildlings how to have.. sex. she said , you know nothing jon snow."

"GF: ""Can I be frank?"" Me: ""Sure, but I'd be more comfortable if you were a woman."""

"Q. Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? A. So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills."

"Most technology problems can be fixed two ways: 1) Turn it off and on. 2) Don't be an idiot."

"Probably the worst thing about dying a virgin would be all the dead terrorists that are waiting for you."

"Just found out my wife is a dolphin in a wig."

"An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar The bartender turns to them, takes one look, and says, ""What is this - some kind of joke?"""

"When I'm away from my girlfriend, I feel incomplete... ... But I love it when we're together again, because she makes me feel hole."

"Studies show... Studies show that intelligent people swear more than stupid motherfuckers."