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Joke of the Day

"What's common to the cockpit of a modern fighter aircraft and the inside of a headhunter's hut? The heads-up display"

"What do you call a militant whovian A **whooligan**"

"Apparently the Burger King account is suspended while they think of a stronger password than ""horsemeat""."

"When I was a kid, you could go into a corner shop with $1 and come out with 2 cokes, 3 Freedos and a magazine. Nowadays, CCTV everywhere."

"I used to think the brain was the most important organ. Then I thought, *look what's telling me that.*"

"Horrible Breakfast wife: ""do u want your eggs boiled?"" husband: ""no, first boil your milk"""

"You guys hear that Bono fell off the stage at the big U2 concert last night? He got a little too close to the edge."

"A man once became addicted to cocaine from foreign countries. He spent all his money to travel and sample the evil drug in all parts of the world. Thankfully, he stopped once he hit the Finnish line."

"I can cut a piece of wood in half just by looking at it..... It's true, I saw it with my own eyes."

"What did the tv say to the remote control? ""you turn me on"""