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Joke of the Day

"Finally I have an excuse for getting fat, heard on radio about girl who been eating in her sleep ... That's it, I've got that !"

"What is the difference between a church and a cult? Their Punch."

"When I was a teen, my parents talked to me about safe sex. I'm having the same talk with them about the Reply All button."

"""Sir, we're mining too many useless minerals!"" Hitler: ""Mine fewer then"" Reddit: ""I did **not see** that coming"" EDIT: Shit, I didn't get that Reich at all"

"Fashion Facts - Adam was the first designer- with his Eden line of clothing Eve wore his first creation- the ribbed t-shirt with fig leaf"

"I thought I might be pregnant. It turns out I'm just three months fat."

"An elder man is annoyingly telling a chef how to BBQ. Then the chef says ""you want us to switch positions? You come cook and I go and fuck off"""

"What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dre"

"Trump says that Obama founded ISIS but in his defense Donald thinks that founded is a synonym for ""located"""

"Me: OK bedtime Mind: Hey let's think about stuff Me: No, sleep Mind: OK here are some horrible memories you want to forget Me: FUUUUUUUCK"