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Joke of the Day

"In 5th grade I had to do a report on Ben Franklin and my parents interpreted it as me liking him so my 11th birthday was Ben Franklin themed"

"Did you hear the one about the Dyslexic bank robber H ran in to the bank with his gun drawn and yelled ""Put your air up in the hands mother stickers, this is a fuck up""!"

"Currently searching the want ads for a place that will pay a good salary for me to just curl up in a ball and give up."

"They say there's such a thing as safety in numbers... Tell that to six million Jews."

"Why did it rain on Christmas Eve? Because of Santa and his Raindeer."

"""I'm a social activist. No seriously. I just changed my profile picture to a rainbow."" -everyone on Facebook"

"What do you call an armadillo at a fashion show? A roll model"

"What are a Mexican's favorite dimensions for square dancing? dos y dos"

"What do you call an alien civil rights activist? Martian Luther King jr."

"[wakes up from coma I went into in 1908] so how many more World Series titles have the Cubs won?"