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Joke of the Day

"Why did Karl Marx always buy cheap tea? Because he believed that all proper tea was theft."

"In honour of all the miss piggy/kermit the frog jokes going around today. Why can't miss piggy have children? Because she keeps fucking a frog and their DNA is not compatible. No?"

"Son: Dad I'm in love with a girl just like mum. Father: So what do you want from me? Sympathy?"

"A lot of problems in the world would disappear if we talk TO EACH OTHER instead of about each other."

"You would never know I had a college degree if you saw how many times I tried to push when it says pull."

"What does it mean when they say my car needs ""more low"" I don't know, I don't speak Little Bitch."

"Saw a really attractive woman the other day... She was wearing a miniskirt and a really low-cut shirt and I kept thinking to myself, ""Don't get a boner. Don't get a boner."" She did...."

"I saw a motorcycle with a broken windscreen And I thought ""that's not fairing too well."""

"There are 10 kinds of people in this world those who can count in binary and those who can't."

"What's the difference between Beer nuts and deer nuts? Beer nuts are over a dollar; deer nuts are under a buck."