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Joke of the Day

"Why do clouds make good Kings? Because they have rain over every country in the world."

"There are two major differences between beer and women. When you take the top off a beer, it can't change its' mind, and it can easily be bought and replaced."

"Why do men masturbate? it is sex with someone they love"

"High school plays are a lot like airplanes. People only want to hear about them if they crash and burn."

"What kind of photos do turtles take? Shellfies"

"TIL that if you plug your amp into a 12"" instead of your 8"", you get fireworks. Whoops. Wrong sub."

"What do you call a French sexual offender? A crepeist."

"Thoughts on my new mustache. It's growing on me."

"What is the difference between a banjo and a trampoline? You don't have to take your shoes off to jump on a banjo."

"Why did Pinocchio tell lies? Because he was a fucking liar! -from Louis CK's AMA-"