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Joke of the Day
"Why do clouds make good Kings? Because they have rain over every country in the world."
Next Joke
"Doubt this is welcome in /r/ShowerThoughts but thought of it there. How many rascist Drink names can we collectively think of? I'll edit the best ones into this post. Mine was ""*White Power*-ade""."
"Someone on my FB posted a snap that said ""I'm boared"" And I'm just like....... *don't comment *don't comment *don't comment *don't comment"
"5 year old: ""That's a big truck!"" ""It's a moving truck."" ""ALL TRUCKS MOVE."" Why am I the one that feels like an idiot?"
"Do the French play video games? Wii"
"Speaking of short term memory,"
"Mommy, mommy can I lick the bowl out? Noooo...just flush the toilet like a normal person......"
"Going to show my kids before and after pictures of Lindsay Lohan and say this girl didn't think she needed a nap either."
"A strong person stands up for himself. A stronger person stands up for himself while bench pressing another person standing up for himself."
"Four years ago I asked out the girl of my dreams, today I asked her to marry me She said no both times"