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Joke of the Day
"Excuse miss can you tell me does this rag smell like chloroform?"
Next Joke
"Verne Troyer was pick-pocketed on a recent trip to New York. I can't believe someone would stoop that low."
"Two Condoms Two condoms are walking down the street and pass a gay bar. The first condom turns, looks at the other and asks; Wanna get shit faced?"
"*puts Fitbit on Roomba *eats crackers with no plate or napkin"
"A LAWYER AND A POLITICIAN What do you get when you cross a corrupt lawyer with a crooked politician? Chelsea Clinton."
"I like my women how I like my file systems. FAT and 32"
"What do you call El Chapo suffering from seizures? Narcolepsy"
"4 words. 5 syllables. Easy to say. Hard to prove. ''I am a zebra.''"
"What do you call an orange thats been in the sun too long? tangerine"
"It seems kid of arbitrary that people want their skin to be tan and their teeth to be white. In Opposite Land, I must be a fuckin' hottie."