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Joke of the Day
"Why do white girls help fight heartburn? Because they're so basic."
Next Joke
"What do you call it when you grind your teeth because you are bugged you forgot your dental floss? Flossless compression!"
"Scientists have invented a way to send messages to alternate universes... ... they are calling them ""parallelograms""."
"just found out i like being called sugar butt. 35 years of feminism down the fuckin drain."
"Just ordered wonton soup Hope my apartment can hold the weight"
"How can you tell if a person's a vegan? Don't worry, they'll tell you."
"Just met a guy.Omg he was so fit! Just met a guy.Omg he was so fit. Handsome even. Never will I met a guy like him again. Caring. Emotional. Nice. And his name was the first letter of each sentence"
"What do rodents with an inclination towards mathematics use for their auctioning needs? thepiratebay"
"Just spilled beer on my crotch, so to save myself from the embarrassment, I pissed my pants. Can't have people thinking I'm a sloppy drinker"
"A neutron walks into a bar. The neutron asks ""how much for a drink?"" The bartender replies ""For you, no charge."""