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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when you grind your teeth because you are bugged you forgot your dental floss? Flossless compression!"

"Why did the Elton John wax dummy get down voted? Because it was fake and gay."

"""do you have dailysex?"", John received a text... ""Oh idneed, I hvae dyselxia. Hwo did yuo konw?"""

"I was just awarded a trophy for laziness. All I need now is for someone to accept it on my behalf."

"How does a leopard change its spots ? When it gets tired of one spot it just moves to another !"

"Last night, my Chevy was bitten by a vampire. Now it's Vlad the Impala."

"How do you call a hearing-impaired duck? **HEY DUCK!!!!!**"

"Dating is like a See-saw Not very fun when one of you is fat."

"[first day as Niagara Falls tour guide] And to the left you can see [frantically flips through your guide] water."

"Why do Jewish men get circumcised? Because Jewish women only want things that are 20% off."