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Joke of the Day

"I just want to be wealthy enough to fill a swimming pool with puppies. A lot of puppies are going to die but I think it will be worth it"

"If I would brush my teeth as vigorously as the people in the toothpaste commercials do, my sink would look like a murder scene."

"Q: What did the skunk use to contact his girlfriend? A: His smellular phone!"

"What do you call a black Canadian? Just 'Canadian'."

"I was eating a piece of Gouda... And I was trying to describe it. I didn't want to say it was good because that would've been to cheesy."

"Every day is a new day. For someone with Alzheimer's or Dementia."

"Whats the question to the answer ""it's a cockrobin"" What's that up my ass Batman?"

"Why did the mermaid wear sea shells? Cause she was too big for B- shells! (my 6 year old niece likes to tell this joke)"

"Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes"

"Waiting for Bernie Sanders to come out from under the ring and hitting someone with a steel chair to claim the presidential belt."