14600

Joke of the Day

"Me: ""Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer."" Friends: ""No thanks."" Enemies: ""Also no thanks."""

"What did the cab driver say when the black man got into his cab? Where to sir?"

"My cat cares about me. LOLZ that's the joke."

"[Founding Fathers] -But how do we get court witnesses 2 tell the truth? -They swear on a bible? -Thats stupid -Hey lunch's here -Done[gavel]"

"What does a pizza boy and a gynecologist in have common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it."

"If the world was made of LSD, I'd learn to walk on my tongue."

"Didja hear about the LGBT DJ in Paris who'll only play 50's US rock songs? Yeah - he calls himself ... wait for it ... Cousine Brucie"

"Patient: The trouble is doctor I keep pulling ugly faces. Doctor: Don't worry I don't expect anyone will notice."

"They told me that finishing last in the marathon is nothing to be ashamed of. Its completing the event that's important. Nevertheless, that didn't make my gangbang experience any better."

"I want to pick up a hitchhiker before I die. Not like right before I die, but you know."