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Joke of the Day

"Did you know you can see through Caitlyn Jenner? She is trans-parent."

"How do the Russian people feel about their government? They're Putin up with it."

"Someone told me it was important to have relationships with positive people. Now I have AIDS"

"My girlfriend spends all her money on expensive perfumes.. I feel like she has no common scents."

"My wife doesn't know this, but for the first 3 years of our marriage I thought we were supposed to share a toothbrush."

"What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion."

"Date: I like old-fashioned guys Me: *dies of polio*"

"What do you get if you put 20 blondes in a row standing ear to ear? A wind tunnel."

"Why Can't a Nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot"

"What's the difference between a lentil and a chickpea??? I wouldn't pay $200 to have a lentil on my face."