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Joke of the Day

"What do you get when you cross a retard with a gang banger? Someone who sprays graffiti on chain link fences."

"I was driving earlier and a guy pulled out right in front of me... Those idiots could have caused a crash!"

"How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good? Put a nipple on it!"

"A joke for the cerebral...What do you call it when a bunch of crows agree to meet later? Premeditated murder."

"Paula Deen is set to release memoirs about life with Type 2 diabetes It will be titled ""Paula Deen - For Butter or Worse"""

"You ever had garbage in one hand but you accidentally throw out the thing that you want in your other hand? LOL. Anyways, the baby's ok."

"one time i slam dunked a basketball so good we were out of school for a week people just needed time to process"

"You're too drunk, dear. Alcohol you later."

"What gets longer when pulled, fits between breasts, inserts neatly in a hole, and works best when jerked? A seatbelt"

"How Do You Make Spider-Man Cry? Cook him some Uncle Ben's"