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Joke of the Day

"The shortest distance between two points is always closed due to some bullshit construction that should've been finished a year ago."

"My dream woman has a special combination of inner and outer beauty and is, most importantly, too naive to know she's way out of my league."

"Amazing Farmer I met an amazing farmer today, he was out standing in his field.."

"What do you call a chef who's stingy with herbs? PARSLEYMONIOUS"

"I like my coffee like I like my women. Without a penis."

"What is Harry Potters abortion spell? Fetus-Deletus"

"Being with a whore.... Is like sitting on a warm toilet seat. You didn't see the last guy leave, but you know someone was just there."

"My friend asked me if I wanted to watch Dr. Strange. I declined because I have Stranger Things to watch."

"Who was the first man to masturbate in space? The first man in space!"

"What city will Leo Dicaprio never visit ? Osaka."