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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a blonde and a pair of sunglasses? The sunglasses sit higher on your face."

"Who's the most unpopular person at the Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch football match? The person who shouted ""Give me an L!"""

"Cop: You already had your phonecall now state your name for the tape or you're going to jail Ivana Fonekaal: [looks at lawyer]"

"I go hours without using the restroom just so I can let out a huge orgasmic moan when I start to pee & scare other women in the ladies room."

"Did you hear about the horse with the negative altitude? He always said ""Neigh"""

"The best way to lie is to tell the truth, carefully edited truth."

"I was asked what I would give the man who has everything... Well, my phone number for a start."

"My husband told me I had to choose between him and the cats. I miss him sometimes."

"Who's going to lose the upcoming election? Society."

"My arm is asleep. Let's draw mustaches on it."