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Joke of the Day

"Can we hold off on finding a cure for cancer for a minute and focus on getting the timing right on automatic faucets in public restrooms?"

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"What do you call a fortune teller that always predicts happiness for her clients? A hooker with a gimmick"
"""Let's give the bad guy a ponytail."" - 80s movies"
"I like my coffee like I like my women ... Hot, wet, and all over my crotch."
"My friend H has some good jokes But hes almost always silent."
"I love my 5yr old dearly, but if he keeps saying ""Dark"" Vader I may have to sell him."
"What do you call a Hispanic guy's quest to get gender reassignment surgery? Manuel Trans Mission"
"What's the difference between a truck full of marbles and a truck full of babies? You can't unload a truck full of marbles with a pitchfork."
"What did the crowd say when I finished my country name puns? East Timor?"
"(meeting for naming cereal) ""List the ingredients; maybe we'll get inspired."" ""Honey, bunches of oats"" ""I think we're done here."""