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Joke of the Day

"I've Just Set Up a Brothel At Sea for Horny Sailors... business is generally good, but clients tend come in large waves."

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"Chess says everything about men & women. The King has to take things one step at a time, while the Queen can do whatever the hell she wants."
"Female aliens are invading earth and kidnapping men with large cocks. You're in no danger. I'm just writing you to say goodbye."
"She's like a cat. I don't mean in bed, she just ignores me"
"I went to school without my shoes today. I got shoe-spended for a week."
"Spell electricity with three letters. NRG (energy)."
"What would happen if Donald Trump was about to be assassinated? Secret Service would shout ""Donald, Duck!"""
"How To Lose 250 pounds of ugly fat in one day Get a divorce."
"You must be 1/x, Because you are the rate of change of my natural log."
"I get wetter as you get dryer. What am I? A necrophiliac."