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Joke of the Day

"I used to hate math, But then I realized, decimals had a point."

"The iPhone doesn't have a headphone jack and the Samsung battery is exploding... It's like the mobile equivalent of our presidential election!"

"Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup."

"Finally, I got the model wife I always wanted Unfortunately she's a plus size model"

"On Thanksgiving, how does Miley Cyrus stuff her bird? You don't want to know."

"My girlfriend and I broke up because of a difference in religious beliefs. She didn't believe I was God."

"I judge Usain Bolt based on his race All of his races, actually."

"So Rachel Dolezal becomes a Rapper... Her rap name: the notorius W.H.I.T.E"

"A man walks into a chemists ""Hi, I'd like some Viagra please"" asks the man. ""I'm sorry"" says the Pharmacist. ""You can't get that over the counter."" ""You can if you take enough."" replies the man."

"What do you get when you cross a zebra with a flamingo? Some weeeeeeeird shit, man."