143480

Joke of the Day

"In a crowded elevator, tell all the tall people they have to get in the back because you're going to take a group photo."

"Need a joke to tell my Public Speaking class this Monday.. Can be as crude as you want, but no racist or sexist jokes."

"I haven't been doing so well at the poop assembly line... My manager said if I don't pull my shit together soon I'll be fired."

"Over the years, my sexual fetishes have been getting more perverse But it wasn't until I spanked a statue that I realized I hit rock bottom"

"""Full bath?"" ""Yes sir"" ""Double beds?"" ""Yes sir"" ""Pool?"" ""Yes sir"" ""Maid service?"" ""Yes sir"" ""WIFI?"" ""Yes sir"" ""Kids, I found a campsite!"""

"Ok, so lets share our Christmas cracker jokes. Mine was awful. A bottle of lemonade fell on a barmans head. Why wasn't he hurt? It was a soft drink."

"How do you get out of a Russian prison? You have Vladmir Putin a word for you."

"My Mom called me a ""Son of a bitch"" today I told her I agree."

"What is the ghost of an Australians favourite dessert? Boo-meringue"

"What do you do when a feminist, anti-feminist and meninist cross paths? Triggernometry."