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Joke of the Day

"2019: Tumblr blinks offline, satisfied, having completed its mission of collecting all existing TV and film footage as GIF files."

"Why should you never date a tennis player? Because love means nothing to them."

"Thanks to ChristianMingle, I met the woman I will put through a terrifying emotional rollercoaster before I finally come out of the closet."

"Look, Clinton's gonna win. US President order has to follow Star Trek Captain order: white guy, white guy, black guy, woman, Scott Bakula."

"On a scale of 1 to 100, how mature do you think you are? 69"

"What do a pulse and an orgasm have in common? I don't care if she has one."

"How do dentists like their eggs? Poached."

"Jack the lad at work came out with this one today... What's the difference between 3 dicks and a joke? Your mom can't take a joke.."

"The noblest of dogs is the hot-dog... ...it feeds the hand that bites it."

"You can't run in a camp site. You can only ran because it's past tents."