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Joke of the Day
"Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar.. ...and doesn't"
Next Joke
"I joined a reggae band playing the triangle. I just stand at the back and ting."
"just met a guy who's using an empty beef jerky bag as a wallet so don't worry you're probably doing just fine"
"Ahmed Mohamed must have made a bomb ass clock"
"If you like someone, pretend they're a charger and you're an iPhone on 1%. Run to them. Grab them. Plug them in. Wait, I lost the metaphor."
"I wonder if in 100 years, ghosts of today will spell out ""swag"" or ""bae"" on the Ouija boards"
"What happened after an explosion at a French cheese factory? All that was left was de brie."
"What did the cashier say after handing down a wad of currency to Dracula? ""Count Dracula."""
"There are probably fewer bees around now because a lot of them are still in prison for murdering Macaulay Culkin in My Girl"
"Don't get me started. I don't come with brakes."