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Joke of the Day

"Some people say that you should let sleeping dogs lie... But I believe that all animals should tell the truth."

"A priest and a rabbi Are walking past a school, the priest says to the rabbi hey want to screw a little boy and the rabbi says to the priest screw him out of what?!"

"As I approach 50, my wife suggested I get myself one of those high performance penis enlargers... So I have. She's 25 and her name is Candy."

"Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet? Because they could spend years at C."

"Obama has suspended fund raising activities In light of Mitt Romney's recent statements to the press, President Obama has decided to let Mitt Romney do his campaigning for him."

"Sometimes I wish I was a dinosaur, but then I remember they didn't have nipples."

"I just sprayed a mosquito with mosquito repellent. Now he'll never have any friends."

"I was so happy to hear Apple added a new camera feature.. With the addition of panorama I can finally send dick pics to my ex wife!!"

"The first time I realised I was dyslexic... Was when I went to a toga party dressed as a goat."

"Hansel and Gretel is a timeless tale about the importance of killing old ladies."