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Joke of the Day

"i've fallen out of my fair share of windows in my time and lets be honest, glass and air look basically the same"

"Scarecrows love farming When I asked him why he loved farming so much he just said, ""Hay, it's in my jeans."""

"When things are bad, remember: At least you're not as big an asshole as the guy who invented putting walnuts in chocolate chip cookies."

"Sorry I have been gone for the last two days, my son had a quick story to tell me"

"Why is it difficult to make fun of the Large Hadron Collider? Because it's hard to discern."

"If I ran the world, I would enforce a police state where everyone would have to weigh-in before being allowed to order food."

"What do you get when you put 28 Alabama Sorority girls in one room? A full set of teeth"

"I lost my new underwear... ...I only wore them briefly."

"My puppy is a bastard son of a bitch His mother is a single mother"

"What do you call a male prostitute who can't stop laughing? A giggle-o"