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Joke of the Day

"Anybody wanna go halfsies on an orgasm?"

"Q: What did one strawberry say to the other strawberry? A: If you hadn't been so fresh, we wouldn't be in this jam!"

"How Do You Make A Blind Man Angry? Give him a basketball and ask him what it says."

"I put my Grandma on speed dial... I call that instagram!"

"I don't even bother filling out the ""From"" field on gift tags during Xmas. One look at the wrap job, and its VERY obvious."

"What does a gangbanger have in common with a soda machine? They both don't work and always take your money"

"""Liquor in the front, poker in the back"" is not an acceptable tee shirt slogan for my church's charity poker team... I know that now."

"Do headphones just tie themselves in knots while we're not looking?"

"What's the best thing about having sexy with twenty one year olds? There's twenty of 'em. edit: autocorrect is a bitch - we all know what it should say."

"How do Mexicans cut their pizza? With Little Caesars."