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Joke of the Day

"I remember... when I used to be really nostalgic. Those were the days."

"TIL the tooth brush was invented in Arkansas. If it was invented anywhere else it would have been called the teeth brush."

"For a long time I thought I was Jewish. But it turned out to be psychosemitic."

"Please don't joke about WWII, my grandpa died in a KZ camp He fell down from the guard tower."

"Of course everyone seems sexy in a nightclub. There's liquor and you can't hear them."

"What is 6.9? A really great thing ruined by a period."

"I like my beer like I enjoy my violence. Domestic."

"What do you call a dog from another planet? A dal-martian"

"I noticed my wife was reading a book that was titled ""The Silent Wife"". I immediately asked ""That's fiction, right?"""

"Talking to women is like writing code I look back at what I wrote a week later and think ""what the hell was I thinking when I wrote that?!"""