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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a dog from another planet? A dal-martian"

"I can't feel my face when I'm with you, but I love it. Doctor: This is your third Botox appointment. That wasn't even funny the first time."

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I wouldn't pay money to have a garbanzo bean on my face."

"What do you call a cow that's swallowed a stick of dynamite? Abominable."

"Holmes said to his brother, ""Mycroft, all this heroin that Watson administers is making me terribly constipated."" And Mycroft responded, ""No shit, Sherlock?"""

"Teacher: ""Your composition on the assignment ""My dog"" is exactly like your brothers... ...did you copy it?"" Boy: ""No, it's the same dog!"""

"There is no life on earth without water.nBecause without water, there is no coffee.nAnd without coffee, I'll kill you all."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Canon ! Canon who ? Canon open the door then ?"

"How do I stay humble? Well, it's not easy, but I start by being generally bad at almost all things."

"You know, one day auto correct will completely collapse, and that day will be gloria's!!"