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Joke of the Day

"Adults have imaginary friends too... his name is God."

"Two rules I live by #1 Never Take No for an Answer #2 No means No"

"""So, how was your week off ill?"", asked the co-worker to his Scottish counterpart. ""Aye, was okay lad, but it was only a wee cough""."

"I'm bored I think I'll go to the mall, find a really good parking spot and sit there with my reverse lights on."

"What do men do after orgasm? 1% Do it again 1% Go Smoking 1% Fall Asleep 97% Clear History EDIT: Punctuation"

"I cheated on my girlfriend once We were playing monopoly and while she wasn't looking I took some of her money. Then I went upstairs and fucked her sister."

"Waiter there is a fly in my soup! I know but unfortunately we are out of turtle."

"Happy (Belated) Birthday To Everyone"

"Kim Kardashian just had a miscarriage... Her next show is going to be called 'Mopping Up After A Kardashian'"

"Q: What's the most popular afro-american stereotype? A: boombox"