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Joke of the Day

"Lady, your baby needs to chill. This is MY Binky. I found it fair and square after ""someone"" threw it on the ground. Finders keepers."

"What three things does a woman need to do an oil change on her car? Two boobs and a man"

"Yes, in fact I DO know what it's like to bleed like crazy once a month. That's my flossing schedule."

"Have you heard about the dating site for radical jihadists? It's called ""Our Timer"""

"When someone says ""The last thing I'd want to do is hurt you"", I'm wondering why they have a list of things to do that includes hurting me."

"My pedophile support group kicked me out last week I was getting a little behind"

"And your 2015 Miss Universe is Columbia! -Steve Harvey"

"Where could you look up Joan of Arc's profile? On Tinder."

"People always ask what's the best sport to watch at home. It's obviously volleyball because I can't whip my dick out in the stands."

"how do you know you're at a gay picnic? the hotdogs taste like shit"