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Joke of the Day

"Boss left his email open. Me: *looks around, send email to district manager ""i love you"" Now we wait"

"So I suggested to my wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back... Which is apparently an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient."

"""Oh, a bubble bath! That sounds nice and refresHOLY SHIT Ahhhhhhh!"" - Lobsters"

"""I see,"" said the blind man... as he pissed into the wind. ""It's all coming back to me now."""

"Put on sunglasses. Now run past a crowd of people with your index finger on your ear screaming ""SNIPER HAS BEEN SPOTTED SIR"""

"Why should you always have thyme in your first aid kit? Because thyme heals all wounds. :D"

"One snowman says to the other snowman, ""do you smell carrots?"""

"How do skunks like their e-mails? Scent."

"What does a bad salesman and a toilet have in common? They are both full of crap."

"What do you call a Russian with Tourette's syndrome? Yukanol Fukov"