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Joke of the Day

"Put on sunglasses. Now run past a crowd of people with your index finger on your ear screaming ""SNIPER HAS BEEN SPOTTED SIR"""

"I'm not what you call ""country"" I play support in MOBA games because farming is a foreign concept to me"

"Annie, are you ok? You sure? Cool That's how long that song would've lasted if I sang it."

"Did you hear about the dyslexic KKK member? He went around killing gingers."

"i know how hard it must have been for my parents to tell me there was no santa because i just had to tell my parents there's no jesus"

"What is my ex girlfriend's favorite hands on day in math class? Manipulatives. god i'm so lonely"

"What do you call a pensioner at a murder trial? A juryatric."

"I walked into the gym and see a bunch of ladies working out I ask the guy who is running the gym, ""Sir, what machine should I use to impress the ladies?"" He smiles says ""Try the ATM in the lobby""."

"What do you call someone with no body and nose.... Nobody knows."

"Did you know there's a species of antelope that can jump higher than a two story house? This is mostly because the antelope has powerful hind leg muscles, and houses can't jump."