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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a Russian with Tourette's syndrome? Yukanol Fukov"

"My toddler puts his pants on just like everyone else. One arm at a time."

"yo momma so stupid when her gas ran out, she sold her car to pay for her petrol."

"I attended a festival this weekend with premium pay porta-johns.. They had a special, 2 for the price of 1."

"What's the best part of split-pea soup? The cut up peaness."

"How do real partners in crime jokingly introduce themselves to people?"

"I wish 1992 Dr. Dre would come back from the past and beat the shit out of 2012 Dr. Dre for charging 300 bucks for a pair of headphones."

"I cut butter with a regular knife and now it won't stop crying like a little bitch."

"Freaky Friday 2: The mom and daughter switch bodies again The mom doesn't go back She keeps stealing children's bodies She lives forever"

"What is the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my cock down your throat."